Who I am.

I write about the landscape of grief, nature, and the wisdom of fools. The author of four books, my essays, poems, and reviews have been published in over 50 journals, including in the Huffington Post and Colorado Review. I’ve won the River Teeth Nonfiction Book Award, the Chautauqua and Literal Latte’s essay prizes, and my work has been nominated for four Pushcart Prizes and named a notable by Best American Essays. My account of hiking in Yosemite to deal with my wife’s death, Mountains of Light, was published by the University of Nebraska Press. http://www.markliebenow.com.

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

The Body and Grief



I hadn’t connected grief with sex, but Louise Gluck does in a poem where she compares the physical impact of losing someone close with her first sexual experience with a lover.

Our first encounter with both is so powerful, so overwhelming, so eye-popping that we are sure people can tell what has happened just by looking at us. We feel radically different. So we stand before a mirror, or by a calm lake, to see if we can detect any signs of the change in our reflection. And yet, as overwhelming as the experience is, and as transforming as it feels, we see little difference on the surface of our skin.

* If you would like to read the rest of this post, let me know and I’ll send it to you. *

2 comments:

  1. "At a time when thoughts don’t make sense, when words are just words, often we just need to be held."

    I love that.

    I am not much for people touching me or entering my space, but I do remember being very comforted by hugs at my mother's funeral.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. As for hugs, people can always ask if we'd like a hug. Then if we're not feeling that way at the moment, we can decline.

      Delete