What You Can Say and Do

The CBS Sunday morning program this week ran a feature on grief that included an interview with Rebecca Soffer of Modern Loss, a website that shares personal stories of loss. One of the points brought up was that many people who want to help those who are grieving feel uneasy about saying anything because they don’t want to make the grieving feel worse. 

Below are a few suggestions for what you can say and do. I am grateful to Modern Loss for publishing several of my short essays on grief. You can find the links below.

Beyond Food and Shelter

Two of my essays appeared today. Modern Loss published an account of my first Valentine’s Day after my wife died. http://modernloss.com/day-lovers-without-mine/

Open to Hope published an essay about the Refuge in Grief support community. It also includes an overview of grief resources. http://www.opentohope.com/the-fierce-tribe-of-after-grief-with-attitude/

"As the arts inspire creativity in each of us individually, they breathe life into our communities."            Julia Garnett

Two events five years ago this week remind me that there is more to life than having a roof over your head and enough food to eat. As crucial as they are, they aren’t enough. It also reminds me how we, who are normally self-centered, rally for our communities when disaster strikes.

* If you would like to read the rest of this post, let me know and I’ll send it to you. *

Delayed Grieving

One of my essays was just published by Modern Loss. It’s about camping with rock climbers in Yosemite and all of the things I left unsaid when they headed off to climb, knowing that sometimes climbers die. You can read it at - http://modernloss.com/looking-el-capitan/

There are good reasons for not dealing with grief. We have to go to work if we want to keep our job. The children have to be taken to school and helped with their homework. We have to go shopping and cook if we want to eat.

* If you would like to read the rest of this post, let me know and I’ll send it to you. *

Between Death and Goodbye

I am honored to have a short essay published by Modern Loss, an online journal devoted to sharing our stories of grief and building a community of support.

It is about sitting with my wife between her organ and tissue donations and saying goodbye. You can read it online at: http://modernloss.com/between-death-and-goodbye/